Most of us look at selling as an activity. There are certain things
you need to do and ask and say to get the sale. Right? Well, only
partially right; when you mostly focus on what you have to do, you
usually won't do a great job.

This is going to be the first in series of More Clients eZines on
selling as a lead-up to my new "UnSales ToolKit" which will guide
you through the selling process from the inside out.

The majority of Independent Professionals look at selling as a
necessary evil. All kinds of thoughts and emotions come up
regarding selling - and most of them are not so positive.

Are any of the following familiar to you?

•    Selling is manipulative and dishonest.
•    Selling only results in rejection.
•    I don't want to bee seen as pushy.
•    If they really want this service, they'll ask me.
•    It takes forever for a prospect to say "Yes."

Take a moment and make a note of your dominant belief about
selling. It may be a variation on one of the above. But now let's
look a little more deeply. It's not just the thought, but everything
that goes along with the thought.

Your thought also triggers the following:

•    Feelings - Inferior, confused, afraid, uncertain, reluctant
•    Images - Being rejected, being ridiculed, being a failure
•    Body sensations - Sweating, pounding heart, shallow breathing
•    Behaviors - Avoidance, nervousness, talking too much

I think it's pretty obvious that if your experience of selling
matches some of the above, selling is going to be a struggle for
you. Your focus will be on what doesn't work, what you don't like.
And you will attract what you put your attention on.

Here's an exercise to shift your experience of selling.

Imagine an activity that you really love doing. You approach it
with enthusiasm and excitement. You know you'll do it well. You're
eager to engage in this activity and it's very fulfilling.

So pick an activity for you.

It might be a sports activity, spending time with good friends,
cooking a meal, or working with your best clients. It doesn't
matter, as long as you have very positive associations with that
activity.

Now take a look at the experiential elements of this activity:

•    Thinking - What thoughts do you think about this activity?
•    Feelings - How do you feel when you do this activity?
•    Images - What do you see when you anticipate this activity?
•    Body sensations - What do you feel in your body during this activity?
•    Behaviors - What exactly are you doing in the course of this activity?

To really get the experience of this, you might want to close your
eyes and imagine fully participating in this activity when you
enjoyed it the most.

Observe how you are thinking, feeling, picturing, sensing and
behaving. Be aware of how much you enjoy this experience. Notice
how great it feels. Experience it as deeply as you can.

In the next part you'll transfer the experience of your favorite
activity onto the activity of selling. Imagine a selling situation
and then map the experience of the favorite activity onto that
situation.

Remember - you're creating this; you're making it up. So create it
as great as you possibly can. Imagine sitting in front of a
prospect, for instance, thinking, feeling, picturing, sensing and
acting very much like you do when you're involved in your favorite
activity. Really recreate that experience. Make it fun, exciting,
engaging and fulfilling.

Did you get into it?
Did you actually start having positive anticipation of enjoying the
selling activity? Ultimately you create what you experience. So
why not create an experience that is uplifting instead of
dispiriting? This is something you can do - a skill you can learn.

OK, now I'd like you to create a metaphor for selling that ties
into your favorite activity. In a workshop I led this past week,
participants came up with the following metaphors:

Selling is like a party where I've invited all my friends and
I get to interact with them in a very personal, authentic way.

Selling is like boating where I'm easily gliding through the
water and steering where I want to go with virtually no effort.

Selling is like making a beautiful handmade quilt and then
offering it to a good friend.

Selling is like tennis where we play hard but the feeling is one
of friendly competition.

Selling is like climbing a mountain. We go up steadily, step-by-step,
ultimately reaching the peak.

Selling is like playing jazz. It's a lively interaction that
consists of both planned passages and free improvisation.

These images and metaphors will be effective only to the degree
that you are able to embody them mentally and emotionally before
you engage in a selling activity. Do this exercise (thought,
feelings, imagery and metaphor) right before your next sales call.

                                     •      •      •    

The More Clients Bottom Line: If you want to feel good about
selling, you first need to create the experience of feeling good by
adopting a powerful image and metaphor that literally transforms
your experience of selling.